Breakfast of...participation ribbon recipients

It’s been scientifically proven that variety is, indeed, the spice of life, and nowhere is this more evident than at breakfast.  I rarely eat breakfast on the weekends and weekdays are reserved to a Fiber One bar (the consumption of which, incidentally, is the highlight of my day), so when I do indulge in a real breakfast it’s usually an embarrassment of excess and multiplicity.  

Nothing says gluttonous variety like the breakfast bowl, so recently I summonsed my inner Jabba and created the Uber Gooey Tater Tot Casserole and invited my favorite human garbage disposal Gian to be my guinea pig.

Tater tots, four cheeses, and green onions make it decadent while the spinach makes you feel better about how disgusting you are.

 

Recipe:

1/2 bag of potato crowns or the hashbrown du jour (as the french undoubtedly say)
5 eggs
1/2 cup milk
4 oz cream cheese
2 cups shredded mac and cheese blend cheese (cheddar, american, and swiss)
4 oz turkey sausage
3 or 4 green onions, chopped
1/2 spinach, cooked
1 tsp salt
1 tsp pepper
1/2 tablespoon cajun seasoning
8 crackers

Cook hashbrowns and sausage as the package directed. Then, preheat oven to 375.  In an 8x8 baking dish (if metal spray with cooking spray), add a layer of hash browns (about half) to the bottom.  Then, scramble your eggs and place about half on top of the first layer of hash browns, followed by half of the cooked sausage, half of the shredded cheese, and half of the cooked spinach.  Repeat with the remainder of hashbrowns, eggs, sausage, and spinach (but don't add the cheese yet).

Meanwhile, in a saucepan, heat the milk on medium.  Once the mil starts to steam a bit, then add the cream cheese.  Stir until you reach a smooth, sauce consistency.  Then, add the salt, pepper, cajun seasoning, and about half of the chopped green onion.

Next, pour the mixture over your layered ingredients in the baking dish.  Then, add the remaining shredded cheese and green onions to the top.  Crush your crackers on top.  Bake, uncovered, for 20 minutes.

Cause you're everything (bagel) to me

I have a soft spot in my heart for everything bagels.  One reason is obvious: they're incredibly delicious.  Everything bagels are crunchy, savory, salty; a perfect vehicle for a turkey and havarti sandwich or even just with plain cream cheese.  I love when you toast an everything bagel and the little bits on top get slightly charred, intensifying the sweetness of the onion and crisping up the already crunchy sea salt on its crusty exterior, while warming its fluffy blanket-like innards.

But the most intriguing part of the everything bagel is also what makes it so endearing - the everything bagel is a loner.  It gets quarantined in its own bag; segregated from the other bagels in the baker's dozen.  It wreaks of garlic and permeates through its surroundings like Edward Cullen on a balmy day.

Because of this, most see the everything bagel as the Brian Krakow of baked goods; however, I envision it as more akin to a Jordan Catalano.  I imagine the everything bagel not as one relegated to involuntary confinement and social unacceptance, but rather a brooding, perhaps even rebellious breakfast item.  "Whatever, sometimes I just like to be alone with my thoughts" everything bagel says while sulking chilling in his ultra-private, gated paper bag community.

So it only made sense to combine my benevolence for the everything bagel with my obsession with cheese and made an Everything Bagel Cheese Ball.  It's really more a deconstructed everything bagel.  By mixing all of the familiar "everything" ingredients like garlic, onion, and sea salt, with the cream cheese that would traditionally top the bagel, you're able to get all of that wonderful stank without all of those god-forsaken carbs.

RECIPE:

1 8 oz package of cream cheese, softened
2 tablespoons of chives, chopped
1 tablespoon onion powder
1 tablespoon garlic powder
2 tablespoons poppy seeds
2 tablespoons sesame seeds
1 teaspoon sea salt

Combine softened cream cheese with chives, onion powder, and garlic powder and form into a ball.  Wrap the ball in plastic wrap and let chill, about an hour.

Once cream cheese has hardened, combine the poppy seeds, sesame seeds, and see salt on a plate.  Roll the cream cheese ball in the mixture until well covered (add more seeds and salt if you'd like).  Serve cold with bagel chips.

Promises, Promises

Do you ever really pride yourself in something, only to realize later in life that it is, in fact, the one thing at which you consistently fail?  I’d love to say that I pride myself in being a woman of my word.  But I made some promises on my last blog entry that I either am incapable of delivering on, or more accurately, never had intentikns of keeping in the first place.

But I will say this: I tried making cheese.  Twice.  Both times a big, steaming, milky pot of broken dreams.  I can’t figure it out but my mozzarella never turns out.  It’s I’m assuming actually cheese, but it’s crumbly and not really stretchy.   I’ll keep working on it.

In the meantime, the Real Housewives Fantasy League is finally coming to a close.   Jen and I suffered with our draft picks since they were mostly just furniture this season.  Lip-shaped furniture.

Taylor this season on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

But the race is still on for Chrissy and Deanna and we’re going to make things interesting with the Reunion show.   Maybe do some impersonations?  I LOVE turtles!

Anyway, I have two awesome recipes that I’ve come up with that I will share via poorly written text and horrendous photography…

How Embarrassing

I have to admit I'm quite ashamed at my lack of posts as of late.  But I do have plenty to talk about.  Here is a preview of some of the awesome things coming up in the next few weeks...

Guest Blog!
Was it business or pleasure?  Who can tell the difference when you're on an exploration of the finest "cultures" in beautiful Italy!  Nicole shares her experience first hand!

Grilled cheese ON cheese 
I've never felt more ill-qualified to write a cheese blog than when Josh sent me another blogger's recipe for grilled cheese on cheese bread.

Adventures in mozz-making
I finally get around to making some homemade mozzarella and boy does hilarity ensue!  I'm only assuming that some zany antics will take place since I haven't actually gotten around to making the cheese yet.